Page 7 - MidWeek - April 21, 2021

“D r. Andrews, did you see that?”
two alpha titans.” Just. Wow. Actor Rebecca Hall deserves an Academy Award nomina- tion for saying that line with a straight face. (Also in this film is Millie Bobbie Brown as Madison Russell.)
wake up. Man cannot control Robot Monster he make. Robot Monster fight Godzilla. What Kong do?
“That’s robot Godzilla.”
I had a tough time. Perhaps the 8-year-old version of me would’ve enjoyed this film. As a kid, I watched stuff like Flash Gordon, Highlander and all the Jean-Claude Van Damme movies. The sound of lasers firing in a movie puts my wife to sleep. I’ve just discovered incessant roaring is what puts me to sleep. Godzilla vs. Kong is like cinematic Ambien for viewers of a certain age.
“The hab- itat’s not gonna hold much
“No, that’s ... Mecha- godzilla.”
longer.”
“We need to start thinking
I don’t have much else to say. The special effects, are, of course, impressive. It’s a $300 million film.
The cheesy dialogue is im- pressively nonstop.
about off-site solutions.” “The island is the one thing that’s kept him isolated. If he leaves, Godzilla will come for him. There can’t be two alpha
Since watching the film, I can’t stop myself from repeat- ing it. I’ll burst into a room, eye my wife or one of my kids and yell: “There can’t be two alpha titans!” My entire family is sick of it and wishes I never watched the movie.
Watching a giant gorilla duke it out with a giant aquatic stegosaurus with a small head over and over again is, well, it is what it is. Theaters are prob- ably happy. The film grossed $285 million worldwide on opening weekend — more than any other released in the last year. I find myself cheering for this film. I want theaters to succeed.
The neon, CGI lightshow is strangely soothing. I nodded off a couple of times. I woke and had to ask myself, wait, did Kong just retrieve his an- cient magic ax? Primates can’t blacksmith. I nodded off again and woke. Wait ... did Alexan- der Skarsgård just use a space- ship to defibrillate Kong?
titans.”
These are the opening lines
Millie Bobbie Brown reprises her role as Madison Russell in Godzilla vs. Kong. PHOTO BY JORDAN STRAUSS/ INVISION/AP, FILE
Godzilla vs. Kong is cur- rently in theaters and can be streamed on HBOMax.
chrismckinney808@gmail.com
of Godzilla vs. Kong. I ap- preciate the absurdity of the dialogue right off the bat. It’s a tipoff that what I’m about to watch will be utterly ridiculous. Certainly, the title is the bigger indicator, but: “There can’t be
Synopsis: Kong sent to go magic underground. Godzilla beat up Kong on trip. Kong live and still go underground. Ro- bot Monster look like Godzilla
I’ m all for entertainment that stretches the confines of believability. Watchmen and Lovecraft Country do so bril- liantly. But Godzilla vs. Kong?
If you’re old like me and need a nap, watch this movie. If you’re a child, you might dig it. Maybe take your young ones to the theater to watch it. You can nap while they cheer this gorilla of a movie on.
Rotten
A Monstrous Snoozer
PAPAYAS
BY CHRIS MCKINNEY
You May Have Vein Disease
40 million people in the US have been diagnosed with varicose veins. Our goal is to help.
SYMPTOMS: • Restless Legs • Aching
• Heaviness
• Discoloration • Bruising
• Open Sores/Ulcers
• Swelling • Itching • Burning
Spider and varicose veins are symptoms of a progressive disease called VENOUS INSUFFICIENCY. Untreated vein disease leaves you at risk for dangerous conditions like DVT blood clots and non-healing leg ulcers.
RISK FACTORS
GENETICS OBESITY HORMONES AGING
PROLONGED PROLONGED SITTING STANDING
TAKE OUR FREE ONLINE VEIN SCREENING QUIZ at WWW.VEINCLINICSOFHAWAII.COM
OAHU (808) 585-2955
1441 Kapiolani Blvd. Ste. 1902, Honolulu, HI 96814
MAUI (808) 214-5715
140 North Market St. Ste. 103, Wailuku, HI 96793
BIG ISLAND (808) 885-4401
65-1158 Mamalahoa Hwy. Ste. 16, Kamuela, HI 96743
KAUAI (808) 245-4814
3214 Akahi St., Lihue, HI 96766
2020
APRIL 21, 2021 MIDWEEK 7
h
c
’
s
r
o
i
c
e
e
a
d
w
a
a
r
e
d
r
s