Page 29 - MidWeek - Sep 1 2021

I really appreciate my boyfriend, except for one thing: his con-
THE SCIENCE ADVICE GODDESS Amy Alkon
Tales From The Decrypted; Disappear Pressure
said no — I’ m really not looking for long-distance — but now that he’s leaving, I’m sad, and I’m worried I’ve made a mistake. Help! — Confused
stantly posting photos and videos that include me on his Facebook or Instagram. I’m a pretty private person, and I told him I don’t like having my life and our life together posted online. He grudgingly agreed to stop posting things about me, but he thinks I’m being un- reasonable and “paranoid.” —Discreet
That said, it’s understand- able you’d try to retain what- ever shreds of yours you can — like by engaging in the “impression management” sociologist Erving Goffman observed we all do face to face: tailoring the “self” we present and revealing more or fewer “regions” of ourselves, depending on the particular audience.
There’s really no hope of privacy crime scene cleanup when your audience is “every- one on the planet but three Na- mibian guys whose goats keep chewing through their cable.”
Obstacles to love are like situational steroids. We long for what’s out of reach — and all the more romantic if reach- ing it takes crossing the desert on a camel or $553 with a lay- over in Boise.
The scarcity principle is the psychological schem- ing behind ads like: “Today only!” and “Only one sofa at this price!” The looming scarcity (or “scarcity”) shuts down your Department of Reasoning, basically turn- ing you into a dog chasing a couch-shaped squirrel.
Should you decide your feelings were more about the circumstances than the guy, well, you’ re not alone. Imag- ine if Romeo and Juliet’s parents were all, “Hey, you crazy kids ... have fun at the movies!” The play would’ve become a hate story for the ages — after things between them inevitably got kinda meh and Juliet walked in on Romeo in bed with her BFF and her lady-in-waiting.
“Online privacy” is a quaint fiction. The reality: Any info about you, from your sexts to your Social Security number, is probably stealable by any
Get ready for extra cuteness this week. Meet Pepper. He is
a small and furry 2-year-old guinea pig that will win your heart over with his friendly personality. He loves to be held and will oink for attention if you approach his kennel.
Pepper would do well with a family experienced with guinea pigs, or a beginner
Your boyfriend might nev- er agree with your approach to online privacy. However, he might understand it — and gain a deeper understanding into who you are — if you evoke his empathy. Instead of
The perception that some- thing is in short supply or soon will be makes it seem more valuable to us. Psychologist Robert Cialdini calls this the “scarcity principle” and ex- plains that the possibility we
Recognizing how scarci- ty primes us to see through loss-prevention-colored glasses, do your best to set aside “Eek! He’s leaving!” and objectively assess what you two have. In short, is he
basement nosepicker with an IQ over 125.
simply telling him you “don’t like” to appear in social media posts, go into detail about your fears and discomfort at allow- ing an unselect audience a win- dow into your life.
could lose access to something (or someone) jacks us into a motivational state: Go! Chase it! Don’t let it get away!
(and how you are togeth- er) so extraordinary — so near-impossible to find lo- cally — that the thousands of dollars in travel costs and other trade-offs of long-dis- tance might be worth it?
I recently met this guy, and we’ ve spent the entire past week together. Un- fortunately, he’s moving across the country — to- morrow. He asked whether I’ d be open to dating after he moved. I panicked and
get a few guinea
pigs to provide
Pepper and his friends
at Hawaiian Humane
Society enrichment for the rest of their lives, check
out hawaiianhumane.org.
Visit hawaiianhumane.org/ adoptions to learn more about the adoption process and
all of its great programs and services.
SEPTEMBER 1, 2021 MIDWEEK 29
Walk in or schedule your
FREE
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No cost with most insurance.
Visit our pharmacy or CVS.com/Flu for more details.

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family looking to adopt a smaller pet. As you may already know, guinea pigs are social creatures, so it is best to adopt more than one guinea pig. This will ensure Pepper has a companion to keep
him company. Few things are more adorable than watching a muddle of guinea pigs play and run around together.
If you are interested in introducing Pepper into your existing guinea
pig family, or looking to
VISIT HAWAIIANHUMANE.ORG
MidWeek’s
Pet Friends Forever
tlined
PFF
Midweek’s
Pet s Friends Forever
PEPPER
PHOTO COURTESY HAWAIIAN HUMANE SOCIETY